“As Fucked As Me”

Photograph of the original draft of this poem depicting how fucked this paper actually is. A piece of looseleaf paper with handwriting on it, was chartered, shredded and riddled with holes.

“As Fucked As Me”

OutOfExile_IDR – © 2003

Listen to a reading of this poem (1:04)


I can’t swallow… I can’t see!
Pride? How do I stop your echoing lies?
Truth? Do you know these words in your reality?

“I won’t keep you from all that remains of you”
Isn’t that exactly what you do?
Every other day you change the way
you turn the screw, driving it through.
This paper seems as fucked as you!

When will you let me up off the floor?
C’est votre marque d’amour.
Just another dark familyless night.
It’s cold in the bathroom as I slip out of sight,
but it’s warm where you say I belong, isn’t that right?
Then why is it so full of strife?
This paper looks as fucked as life.

Her name means life–that’s what I’ve lived for.
Stolen from me by your love and lore
’til “life” doesn’t even know me anymore.
This picture looks fucked,
as your hate slams the door!

Photograph of the original draft of this poem depicting how fucked this paper actually is. A piece of looseleaf paper with handwriting on it, was chartered, shredded and riddled with holes. The original draft of the poem reads: (This paper looks) as fucked as me I can't swallow... I cant see! Pride? How to stop your (lies) words echoing. Truth? Do you know these words in your reality? This paper looks as fucked as me! "I won't keep you from all that remains of you" Isn't that exactly what you do? Every other day you change the way. You turn the screw, driving it thru. This paper seems as fucked as you! When will you let me up? (redacted word) Oh no that's right. That's just another dark familyless night. It's cold in the bathroom, as I slip out of sight. But it's warm where you say I belong isnt that right? This paper looks as fucked as life (redacted word) means life and thats what I live for Stolen from me by you and yours Till life doesnt even know me anymore This picture looks fucked, as your hate slams the door!
The original draft of the poem from 2003.

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